Bullies on Australian roads

I got attacked four times during a short two hour training ride to McAfees lookout. That was a week ago.

Twice by busses on Waterworks Road and once by a magpie. The forth attack was something else, a grey bird, a touch smaller than a magpie and after some googling I believe it was a Butcher Bird.

Last weekend I did the same ride and stayed well clear of the aggressive busses but had an unexpected close call with a soccer mum driving her son to school. She just wouldn't allow me an inch of the road.

I was, however, prepared for my friend Bully Butcher Bird just before the bus depot on the bottom of the climb.

I kept my eyes out for him when I hit the slight incline that, from my experience, marked the start of his territory. I kept looking up above and behind but could not spot him.

Just last week I had read a brilliant article about the habits of swooping birds in the most recent Australia Geographic magazine and according to their research you are less likely to get attacked when you face the bird. So here I was head up in the air, waiting for the attack and - nothing. Half way up and no bird in sight.

"The research is right or he might be still asleep" I thought to myself when the familiar wings flapped around my ears and my helmet got tapped by his beak. Even having anticipated it, it gave me a little scare. I faced him and he flew off, just like the article had said. I kept looking up and behind but no bird in sight? Little shit! And again - tap tap - on my helmet. How come I could't see him in the shadow on the road? I could see my own shadow as the sun was behind me but not the bird sneaking up on me from above. From above? And then I spotted him, right behind my rear wheel, flying just inches above the road.

What a smart little cookie, he's got it worked out, drafts on you like a Pro and then flies up from below. And I swear I saw a big grin on his little face.

He had fun and so had the school kids that were waiting at the bus stop across the road.

***

Here are some interesting facts from the Australian Geographic magazine:

1. Only up to 12% of magpies are swoopers.

2. They are very specific about who they aim for, 11% only target postal workers, 8% only target cyclists and 52% swoop pedestrians only. Some even target only specific individuals, e.g. one family member, and leave others in peace.

3. Nearly all swooping magpies are male.

4. There are two recorded deaths caused by magpie attacks. In 1946 a 13 year old boy died of tetanus after an attack and a man died in Outback Australia because the beak penetrated the neck and cut his spinal cord.

5. Most birds swoop from behind to intimidate. They keep doing it because most of the time they get rewarded. They swoop - you leave their territory. They are successful.

6. People have successfully befriended swooping magpies by feeding them.

7. Humans are just another predator for them and they attack to protect their offspring. Swooping a human is low level risk, compared to, for example, swooping a fox.

8. 5000 Swoop! packs, containing false eyes stickers and warning posters, have been sold since 1995. Research has shown that false eyes don't help cyclists.